07.04.T02-ES — Evaluation Scorecard: Assessing a Prospective Partner's Nurturing Behaviour?
07.04.T02-ES — Evaluation Scorecard: Assessing a Prospective Partner's Nurturing Behaviour
Purpose
This tool helps you evaluate whether a prospective marriage partner demonstrates the nurturing behaviour necessary to build a healthy, supportive and emotionally secure marriage relationship.
Instructions
Rate the prospective partner against each of the following indicators based on your observations, interactions and experiences. Circle the score that best reflects your assessment.
| Assessment Area | Score (1–5) |
|---|---|
| The person creates an emotionally safe environment where I can express my thoughts, feelings and concerns openly. | 1 2 3 4 5 |
| The person listens attentively and demonstrates genuine interest in my experiences and perspectives. | 1 2 3 4 5 |
| The person notices when I am discouraged, distressed or emotionally burdened. | 1 2 3 4 5 |
| The person responds with empathy rather than indifference when others are struggling. | 1 2 3 4 5 |
| The person provides encouragement and support during difficult situations. | 1 2 3 4 5 |
| The person remains emotionally available during difficult seasons rather than withdrawing. | 1 2 3 4 5 |
| The person demonstrates patience when dealing with another person's weaknesses, mistakes or limitations. | 1 2 3 4 5 |
| The person remains present and engaged when conflict or misunderstandings arise. | 1 2 3 4 5 |
| The person demonstrates concern for vulnerable, distressed or disadvantaged people. | 1 2 3 4 5 |
| The person's actions consistently demonstrate care rather than merely expressing care verbally. | 1 2 3 4 5 |
Scoring Guide
| Score | Meaning |
|---|---|
| 1 | Very Poor |
| 2 | Poor |
| 3 | Fair |
| 4 | Good |
| 5 | Excellent |
Total Score: ______ / 50
Interpreting Your Score
| Score Range | Interpretation |
|---|---|
| 41–50 | Strong Evidence of Nurturing Behaviour. The person consistently demonstrates emotional awareness, care, encouragement and support. |
| 31–40 | Generally Nurturing but Requires Further Observation. The person demonstrates several positive qualities, though some areas require closer attention. |
| 21–30 | Proceed with Caution. Important weaknesses may affect the person's ability to build a nurturing marriage relationship. |
| 10–20 | Significant Concerns Exist. The person demonstrates multiple indicators associated with a limited capacity to nurture and support others. |
Part A: Evidence from Observation
1. What actions have demonstrated the person's ability to create emotional safety?
2. When have I seen the person acknowledge and consider another person's feelings, concerns or perspective?
3. What evidence suggests that the person provides encouragement and support during difficult situations?
4. What evidence suggests that the person remains emotionally available rather than withdrawing when situations become difficult?
5. What evidence suggests that the person's care for others is genuine rather than selective, convenient or self-serving?
Part B: Learning from the Chapter
6. Does the person demonstrate concern for vulnerable, distressed or disadvantaged people in a manner that contrasts with Nancy's treatment of Sarah?
7. How does the person respond when another individual's needs, concerns or priorities compete with his or her own interests?
8. Have I observed behaviour similar to Nancy's tendency to dismiss situations that mattered to other people? Explain.
9. How does the person respond when another individual requires emotional support, encouragement or reassurance?
10. Have I observed evidence that the person can remain present and supportive during periods of illness, hardship, disappointment or emotional distress?
Part C: Assessing Marriage Readiness
11. Which qualities suggest that the person can build a nurturing marriage relationship?
☐ Creates emotional safety
☐ Demonstrates empathy
☐ Encourages and supports others
☐ Remains emotionally available
☐ Provides care during difficult seasons
☐ Listens attentively
☐ Demonstrates patience
☐ Shows concern for vulnerable people
☐ Supports another person's growth and development
☐ Other: ______________________
Provide examples:
12. Which nurturing qualities require further development before the person is ready for the responsibilities of marriage?
13. Which weaknesses in the person's nurturing behaviour would require me to spend more time observing the relationship before making a marriage decision?
14. Which behaviours would cause me to question the person's suitability for a nurturing and emotionally supportive marriage?
Part D: My Overall Assessment
15. What is the strongest evidence that the person can create emotional safety, provide support and remain present during difficult seasons?
16. Which weakness in the person's nurturing behaviour would have the greatest impact on a future marriage relationship if left unaddressed?
17. Based on the evidence available, how would I describe the person's readiness to build a nurturing marriage relationship?
18. What should my next step be?
☐ Continue building the relationship
☐ Observe the relationship for a longer period
☐ Discuss specific observations openly
☐ Seek counsel
☐ Reassess the relationship
☐ Other: ______________________
