09.04.11 The 5th Key for Evaluating a Prospective Partner's Approach to Trust Are Small Commitments Handled Reliably?

5. Are Small Commitments Handled Reliably?

Observe how the prospective partner handles small responsibilities. Can people rely on the person to consistently fulfill ‘small duties’ or is it only the ‘big assignments’ that are taken seriously?

Mary must have recognised Joseph’s reliability in performing his duties responsibly irrespective of size or perceived importance. While Mary had received a divine visit from a real live angel, Joseph's instructions came through dreams. Nonetheless, he did not minimise their importance but acted promptly. For instance, after receiving the warning about Herod’s intentions, the man immediately took Mary and the child and departed for Egypt in order to protect them (Matthew 2:13–14).

Christine demonstrated a very different pattern in her daily conduct. Roland began to notice that even simple commitments were not handled carefully. Deadlines were frequently missed, explanations for incomplete work became common and promises that had been made were often left unattended. In the end, these repeated failures made it difficult for Roland to rely on her, as she could not be trusted to complete the tasks.

Reliability is often revealed in the way ordinary responsibilities are handled. A prospective partner understands that small commitments carry meaning because they demonstrate his or her discipline and dependability. When a person treats everyday responsibilities seriously, you will have the confidence that larger obligations will also be handled with care, which in essence will enhance your trust for that person.