09.04.09 The 3rd Key for Evaluating a Prospective Partner's Approach to Trust Does the Person Accept Accountability/Responsibility Without Resentment or Bitter Feelings?

3. Does the Person Accept Accountability/Responsibility Without Resentment or Bitter Feelings?

Observe how the prospective partner responds when required to be accountable for a decision or action the person took. When questions arise or clarification is needed, does the individual respond calmly and explain the issue,; or does she or he become defensive, irritated, resentful or bitter?

Mary must have recognised Joseph’s readiness to be accountable for the responsibilities that God had bestowed on him. The man fully accepted the obligations of being a husband to Mary and an earthly father to her son with no bitterness or questions asked (Matthew 1:24). Once he understood that it was God he had to account to as a priority, the possibility of being misunderstood by the community no longer mattered. That accountability and responsibility must have contributed greatly to Mary's trust for Joseph.

Christine reacted very differently when Roland raised questions about her work and the inconsistencies in her explanations. Instead of giving clarity, the woman would often respond with irritation and blame. Questions that required honest answers were treated as accusations. Any attempts to understand the situation were met with defensiveness. And, as these reactions continued, it became increasingly difficult for Roland to have open and constructive conversations with the woman, which ended up diluting his trust for her.