09.02.05 How Abraham and Sarah Navigated Conflict - A Biblical Revelation

How Abraham and Sarah Navigated Conflict – A Biblical Revelation

Abraham and Sarah’s story is one of promise and complexity. Their lives were marked by countless conflicts, from family disputes to foreign entanglements. Yet, from the beginning, Abraham carried himself as a man who did not shy away from difficult moments. For Sarah, walking beside a spouse who faced conflict without panic, denial or aggression may well have provided reassurance and stability, allowing her to face her own struggles with more confidence, courage and trust.

One of the first challenges that Abraham encountered was a situation that drew on his emotional intelligence and problem-solving abilities, arising from living too close to his nephew Lot. When God blessed Abraham with abundance, his livestock increased to the point that the land could no longer support both households. Before long, his herdsmen and Lot’s herdsmen began quarrelling and fighting over grazing land, a situation that disturbed Abraham’s relationship with Lot as well as the wider household. The Bible narrates how Abraham maintained peace by initiating a separation agreement. “Let’s part ways,” he said. “You take the left and I’ll go right. Or if you take the right, I’ll go left” (Genesis 13:8–9). He offered Lot the choice, prioritising peaceful relations over personal gain.

There was a time when Abraham headed to Gerar, seeking refuge from a famine and found himself in the kingdom of Abimelech. A conflict erupted between him and the king when Abraham presented Sarah as his sister, without disclosing that she was his wife. Abimelech unknowingly took her into his household, only for God to reveal the woman’s true identity in a dream. When the furious Abimelech confronted Abraham, the man confessed his fear and admitted that he had acted to protect himself (Genesis 20:9). The situation did not escalate further. Instead, Abimelech returned Sarah, gave Abraham gifts and offered him protection, after which the two men entered into a covenant (Genesis 20:14–16). The conflict was settled amicably through conversation and mutual agreement.

Another conflict management challenge worth mentioning was the Sarah–Hagar saga. As you may already know, the main challenge that Abraham and Sarah faced was Sarah’s barrenness, despite the fact that God had promised to give them a child. The Bible narrates how, in her distress, she chose her maidservant, Hagar, as a surrogate. That was how Ishmael was born. However, conflict soon followed when Hagar began to look down on Sarah, sparking tension between the two women (Genesis 16:4). Sarah brought the matter to Abraham, hoping that he would handle the conflict. Abraham, however, delegated the responsibility back to Sarah, saying, “She is your maidservant. Deal with her as you think best” (Genesis 16:6, NKJV). Abraham did not interfere with his wife’s decision, even though the outcome was painful, ultimately leading to Hagar and Ishmael’s departure.

Then there was another conflict that arose when Abimelech’s servants took Abraham’s wells, sparking tension between the two leaders. But instead of getting defensive or aggressive, Abraham calmly approached Abimelech about the issue, listening carefully to the king’s explanation. As it turned out, Abimelech was not even aware of his servants’ actions. The issue was resolved through an agreement and the two men confirmed their understanding through a covenant (Genesis 21:25–31).

In a nutshell, there were many conflicts that Abraham successfully resolved throughout his life, which helped to maintain healthy relationships with his wife Sarah, their household and those around them; leaving a lasting legacy.