08.05.11 The 5th Key for Evaluating a Prospective Partner's Decision-Making Ability

5. Does the Person Take Responsibility for the Outcomes of His or Her Decisions?

Observe how the prospective partner responds when a decision produces difficulty or unintended consequences. Does the person accept responsibility and address the outcome directly; or does she or he minimise the impact, shift blame or expect others to carry the burden created by his or her choice?

Sarah would have noticed Abraham's ability to accept responsibility irrespective of whether his decisions led to negative outcomes. For instance, the man had been willing to face the consequences of his decision in Egypt. When Pharaoh discovered the deception concerning her identity, Abraham did not deny the matter, resist correction or shift blame but humbly obeyed the ruler’s command by departing with his household as instructed (Genesis 12:17–20). Abraham accepted the outcome of his decision rather than attempting to deflect or evade responsibility.

Sheila's case was different. The girl struggled with accepting responsibility. You may recall the time Fredrick confronted her about the impulsive Dubai trip and how she laughed lightly, saying, “Things will sort themselves out..,” At that point, Sheila had effectively shifted the burden of managing the consequences of poor decisions to Fredrick. As if that was not enough, she did not appear to show any remorse when the Hadassah Woman Beauty Pageant fell through, not caring that the Country Director would hold Fredrick responsible for the non-submission of the project proposal.

A partner’s willingness to accept responsibility when decisions produce negative outcomes demonstrates accountability and maturity in judgement. When a partner acknowledges his or her responsibility rather than avoidance, problems can be constructively addressed thence generating and strengthening trust within your relationship.