08.04.14 The 8th Key for Evaluating a Prospective Partner's Readiness for Progress and Development

8. Are Personal Responsibilities Carried Independently Rather than Shifting them to Other People?

Observe whether the prospective partner demonstrates willingness to take responsibility for his or her own life. Does the individual actively work towards financial stability, emotional maturity and confident decision-making; or does she or he repeatedly depend on other people to manage situations that should be handled personally?

Asenath must have observed Joseph’s ability to carry his personal responsibilities independently. In every environment he found himself in, whether in Potiphar’s house, in prison or in national administration, the man executed the activities entrusted to him without shifting them to other people. He took ownership of his roles, carrying out the responsibilities diligently.

Likewise, Joseph must have recognised Asenath’s readiness to take responsibility for the roles entrusted to her and carry them out diligently. She embraced her role within their household and conducted herself in a manner consistent with Hebrew culture and religious beliefs.

Brenda’s experience was different given her tendency to shift responsibility rather than be personally accountable for her shortfalls. Time and time again, she would expect Richard to shoulder the outcomes of her irresponsibility. The girl habitually sought Richard’s assistance whenever her decisions failed, but never demonstrated any willingness to learn, adjust or face the consequences of her choices. You may recall how she expected the engineer to ‘own the scandal’ of her tilting building despite ignoring his professional advice.

Marriage is a partnership, not a rescue mission where one person plays the role of a liberator while the other is passively waiting to be saved. The relationship functions best when each of you carries responsibility for his or her own growth, decisions and stability. When one partner consistently depends on the other for emotional regulation, financial direction or decision-making strength for instance, the relationship becomes unbalanced. A healthy partnership requires two individuals who contribute responsibly and support each other’s continued development.