01.06.T03-AP — Action Planning: Practising Forgiveness Deliberately and Wisely
01.06.T03-AP — Action Planning: Practising Forgiveness Deliberately and Wisely
Purpose
This tool helps you develop a practical plan for forgiving an offender in a way that addresses your heart, thoughts, behaviour, boundaries and any appropriate reconciliation.
Part A: The Person I Need to Forgive
1. Whom do you need to forgive or forgive more completely?
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2. What offence are you choosing to close rather than continue carrying?
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3. What apology, explanation or change have you been waiting for before allowing yourself to forgive?
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Part B: Conditioning My Heart and Thoughts
4. What deliberate statement will you use to reinforce your decision to forgive?
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5. Which recurring negative thought about the offender will you stop entertaining?
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6. What positive or balanced truth about the person or situation can replace that thought?
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7. What will you do when painful feelings return after you have decided to forgive?
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Part C: Demonstrating Forgiveness
8. What respectful or kind behaviour can demonstrate that you are no longer seeking revenge?
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9. What “offences log book” behaviour must you stop?
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10. How will you resist rejoicing when the offender experiences difficulty?
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11. What good quality or contribution of the offender can you acknowledge without excusing the wrongdoing?
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Part D: Wisdom and Reconciliation
12. What weakness or risk do you need to remember even after forgiving?
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13. What boundary, if any, is necessary to protect your health, safety or wellbeing?
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14. Is reconciliation appropriate? If yes, what small and realistic first step could you take?
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15. What would show that you are trying to manipulate the offender rather than simply forgive?
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16. What will help you keep going without repeatedly looking back at the offence?
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Part E: My Commitment
17. Complete this statement: I choose to forgive __________ for __________, and I will demonstrate that decision by __________.
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18. When will you review whether bitterness is still leaking back into your thoughts or behaviour?
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