01.05.T02-SA — Self-Assessment: How Well Am I Protecting My Heart from Bitterness?
01.05.T02-SA — Self-Assessment: How Well Am I Protecting My Heart from Bitterness?
Purpose
This tool helps you assess the preventive habits described in the chapter before the next offence tests them.
Scoring: Consistently = 4 Often = 3 Sometimes = 2 Rarely = 1. For Question 6: Very well = 4 Fairly well = 3 A little = 2 Hardly at all = 1.
Part A: Expectations and Perspective
1. I avoid assuming that relatives, friends or colleagues must respond exactly as I would.
☐ Consistently
☐ Often
☐ Sometimes
☐ Rarely
________________________________________________________________________________
2. I resist allowing a painful past experience to make me expect the same behaviour from a different person.
☐ Consistently
☐ Often
☐ Sometimes
☐ Rarely
________________________________________________________________________________
3. I judge people as individuals rather than comparing them with previous offenders.
☐ Consistently
☐ Often
☐ Sometimes
☐ Rarely
________________________________________________________________________________
4. I remember my own need for forgiveness when I am tempted to judge another person harshly.
☐ Consistently
☐ Often
☐ Sometimes
☐ Rarely
________________________________________________________________________________
Part B: Influences and Self-Knowledge
5. I choose confidants who calm bitterness rather than intensify it.
☐ Consistently
☐ Often
☐ Sometimes
☐ Rarely
________________________________________________________________________________
6. I understand the kinds of behaviour that trigger unusually strong reactions in me.
☐ Very well
☐ Fairly well
☐ A little
☐ Hardly at all
________________________________________________________________________________
7. I monitor my feelings before resentment has time to take root.
☐ Consistently
☐ Often
☐ Sometimes
☐ Rarely
________________________________________________________________________________
8. I can identify when my own personality or expectations are contributing to a conflict.
☐ Consistently
☐ Often
☐ Sometimes
☐ Rarely
________________________________________________________________________________
Part C: Thoughts and Reactions
9. I stop myself from inventing motives for an offender without checking the facts.
☐ Consistently
☐ Often
☐ Sometimes
☐ Rarely
________________________________________________________________________________
10. I avoid making decisions or sending messages while emotionally charged.
☐ Consistently
☐ Often
☐ Sometimes
☐ Rarely
________________________________________________________________________________
11. I can distinguish between an offence that requires attention and one that is wiser to ignore.
☐ Consistently
☐ Often
☐ Sometimes
☐ Rarely
________________________________________________________________________________
12. I consider short, medium and long-term consequences before reacting.
☐ Consistently
☐ Often
☐ Sometimes
☐ Rarely
________________________________________________________________________________
13. I prevent one person’s offence from making everything and everyone around me appear negative.
☐ Consistently
☐ Often
☐ Sometimes
☐ Rarely
________________________________________________________________________________
14. I can put myself in an offender’s position without excusing genuinely wrong conduct.
☐ Consistently
☐ Often
☐ Sometimes
☐ Rarely
________________________________________________________________________________
Total Score: __________ / 56
Score Interpretation
14–23: The score suggests that protection against bitterness and unforgiveness requires substantial attention. Review the lowest-rated statements and identify the attitudes or habits that need deliberate change.
24–34: The score suggests developing strength in protection against bitterness and unforgiveness, but important inconsistencies remain. Give priority to the lower-rated responses.
35–45: The score suggests generally healthy protection against bitterness and unforgiveness. Preserve the stronger patterns while strengthening the responses that are less consistent.
46–56: The score suggests strong and consistent protection against bitterness and unforgiveness. Continue practising these qualities while remaining honest about any lower-rated response.
Part D: My Prevention Priority
15. Which preventive habit is strongest in you?
________________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________
16. Which preventive habit is weakest?
________________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________
17. What kind of offence is most likely to test that weakness?
________________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________
18. What will you need to do differently before that test comes?
________________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________
